All kinds of people long to write and need support, but this post is especially for introverts. I am a fierce loner, a bit shy, extremely reflective.
For every hour I spend with people, I need at least two alone, just to regroup and think. I find talking on the phone for longer than 20 minutes almost impossible to do. My jaws start to hurt (I have TMJ) and I start thinking about all the reading I need to do.
So I have been writing in isolation for years.
Don’t do that.
It can be painful.
Try what I am just learning to embrace: Find some support. (Read and share on NOW. I want to offer support in any way I can.)
Though introverted, I am strong-willed, determined, and proud to a fault. These are traits that will keep a novice a novice forever. Learn from my mistakes.
Here’s what I am trying now and loving the people I meet along the way:
- Reaching out to writers. Every writer I have met so far has been kind and generous.
- Interacting on forums. I love Suite101 mainly because of its writing forum. The writers there respond to questions quickly and they are knowledgeable about EVERY thing.
- Reading and sharing what I’m learning with others.
- Going out of my way to meet new people. (I’m working on this, but in a long line at the store, the last thing I want to do is start chatting. I want to take out the article in my bag and start reading.)
- Interact with public speaking groups.
- Accepting speaking engagements. (This is why I started doing number 5.)
- Going to author talks and actually talk to the people around me. (I’ve always loved these, but didn’t say too much while I was there.)
Writers used to be able to be like me, be aloof and pensive. Today this doesn’t work. Making connections with people help writers learn new stuff, find out about writing opportunities, and sharpen public speaking skills. (You’re going to need these later when you’re doing author readings.)
What about you? What do you do to connect with others?
What about you? What do you do to connect with others?
Hi KaaVonia. I'm already looking forward to your next blog entry. I especially like your comment about not wanting to chat to strangers - or even friends/family for long. That's me to a 'T'. And yet you teach, which means talking and answering students questions for hours every day. And I understand that: it is a different environment. The problem I have is an underlying assumption that people will not be interested in what I have to say. Teaching is different; the people with whom you are communicating by definition want what you have to offer. It's the sme with writing; the person you are with may not be interested in your stuff but, by putting it out there you should find someone who is. The other thing I find is that I don't generally think fast enough to make an apt contribuition to a conversation. I like to choose my words carefully and writing gives me the time to do that.
ReplyDeleteHi, Frank! Thanks for the compliment and commenting. You know I think teaching and answering questions all day might be one of the reasons I choose to be quiet so often. We've got stuff in common. I usually have so many thoughts going through my mind that my mouth doesn’t quite catch up. I am also subject to Perry moments. As a matter of fact, I was glad Perry stumbled publicly last week; it made me see I’m not alone.
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